Are You a Toxic Leader or Just a Tough Boss?
Enlightened organizations understand that employees work at their best when they are treated with trust, respect, and fairness. At the same time, organizations are waking up to the fact that abusive leaders drive away talent, making them simply too expensive to keep. The question arises: How do we identify a toxic leader?
Companies are beginning to understand the need to address dysfunctional behaviors at work, given that the presence of a toxic work culture is driving away 1 in 5 employees at an annual cost of $44.6 billion to American organizations. As they begin to craft organizational policies to address these negative workplace actions, many companies are understandably confused about how to determine the difference between a toxic leader (think: bullies and bad guys) and someone who is simply a tough boss. It is a critical distinction, since toxic leaders are universally bad for an organization, while tough bosses are absolutely essential for long-term success.
Based on empirical research conducted by this author, here are some of the most common attributes of each type of individual.
Toxic Leaders: Who They Are and What They Do
In general, toxic leaders act aggressively toward subordinates, are highly critical, demand almost blind loyalty, frequently blame or take credit for the work of others, and play mind games designed to keep people off balance. They often threaten or intimidate the people they lead through vicious insults or angry tirades intended to demean, undermine, and publicly humiliate those on the receiving end. Though rare, they sometimes engage in physical attacks too. Their subordinates generally hate or fear them — often both — and try to stay out of their line of sight.
Toxic leaders tend to exhibit certain characteristics. A typical toxic leader:
- cares about achieving results so much that he fails to consider the impact of the work and schedule on employees and their families.
- excessively focuses on her own pay and promotions.
- consistently takes credit for the work of others.
- always thinks he is right and that his ideas are best.
- fails to get to know employees on a personal level.
- is unconcerned or oblivious to employee morale.
- fails to listen to people and their ideas (because she considers it to be a threat to her authority).
- often makes short-term decisions that make him look good but that will likely harm the organization in the long run.
- appears charming and personable to her boss while treating her employees badly (the “kiss up and kick down” approach).
- threatens, intimidates or humiliates people.
- treats people unfairly, inconsistently, and with a lack of respect.
- blames others for mistakes without taking any personal responsibility.
- has an inflated sense of self-importance.
- commits to meeting goals without securing the proper funding or personnel.
- fails to mentor or develop employees.
- creates a climate of fear, anxiety, or mistrust.
Impact of Toxic Leaders on Their Employees and Organizations
Although toxic leaders can (and often do) achieve extraordinary results, the price is often sky-high. Their impact on people is destructive and often intolerable, but they don’t seem to care. They just want to get the job done as quickly as possible so that they can secure their next promotion and move on up. As a result of their “take no prisoners” and “kiss up and kick down” style of operating, they invariably leave their organizations in far worse shape than when they started.
“Although toxic leaders can (and often do) achieve extraordinary results, the price is often sky-high.”
Outcomes range from an erosion of trust, increased turnover, higher absenteeism, increased drug and alcohol use, as well as reductions in employee motivation, productivity, and job satisfaction. As if that were not enough, their organization is often hit with related costs arising from increases in worker’s compensation claims, plus marked spikes in both mental health and medical expenses (predominantly due to increased employee stress). In combination, these likely outcomes seem like more than enough reason for organizations to want to do something about finding, fixing, or firing these destructive leaders.
Tough Bosses: Who They Are and What They Do
By contrast, tough bosses operate in a professional and self-controlled manner, are highly self-aware and emotionally mature, and make decisions with the best interests of both people and the organization in mind. They care about their people as evidenced by frequent personal interactions with subordinates, a willingness to listen to new ideas, and efforts to quickly resolve interpersonal conflicts.
Almost diametrically oppositive from the characteristics of a toxic leader, a tough boss is someone who:
- cares about achieving results, but also considers the impact of the work and schedule on employees and their families.
- has a high level of self-awareness and emotional maturity.
- shows concern for people by listening and getting to know them on a personal level.
- acts professionally and self-controlled at work.
- seeks to resolve conflicts fairly and quickly.
- gives credit to others for achieving results.
- treats people fairly, consistently, and with respect at all times.
- takes time to mentor and develop subordinates.
- takes personal responsibility for mistakes in her unit or department.
- makes decisions that are in the long-term best interest of the organization.
Impact of Tough Bosses on Their People and Organization
Working for a tough boss can be, well, tough. These leaders are intense and driven individuals with demanding (and sometimes perfectionistic) expectations that undoubtedly create a fair amount of tension and stress for those who work for them. The difference is that their employees understand that it’s not personal and that they are being pushed hard to achieve excellent results that will benefit them personally, as well as positively impact their organization. While it might not always be easy or fun, people who work for a tough boss tend to feel a great deal of respect and loyalty for him or her.
“While it might not always be easy or fun, people who work for a tough boss tend to feel a great deal of respect and loyalty for him or her.”
In addition, tough bosses place a heavy emphasis on employee development and spend a great deal of time mentoring and coaching their people. This focus, coupled with their adherence to high standards, helps to ensure that their organizations are continuously building a pipeline of strong, well-trained future leaders. Ultimately, this is their greatest legacy to the long-term success and sustainability of their organizations.
Self-Assessment: Tough or Toxic?
It is hard to be truly objective about yourself, so you might also want to solicit the opinion of colleagues or friends who will be brutally frank with you. If you are mostly a tough boss, congratulations — your organization needs you and your talents more than ever. However, if your answers to these questions suggest that you have even a few toxic tendencies, it’s time to act.
What Can You Do If You Think You Might be Toxic?
Work on improving your self-awareness, self-regulation, motivation, empathy, and social skills — all of which make up your emotional intelligence. The data showing that emotional intelligence is a key differentiator between star performers and those who flame out early is irrefutable.
Consider apologizing to those you might have offended and get the coaching or counseling that you need. Work on becoming more self-aware and paying closer attention to your impact on others. If you haven’t been through the Myers-Briggs Type Inventory (or a similar personality assessment), consider taking it to learn more about your preferences and personality style. Finally, practice active listening, and participate in your company’s system of 360-degree feedback assessment to see how you are coming across to your boss, peers, and subordinates at work.
Above all, though, refrain from making excuses to yourself or others about your use of power and authority at work in ways that are motivated, at least in part, by ego and self-interest. After all, these are your negative behaviors — own them. Any change is tough, but until you decide that changing yourself is absolutely required and you begin the hard work that it will take to make the required adjustments, leading with a toxic twist will remain your default modus operandi — and it will ultimately derail your career.
Enlightened Organizations Are Demanding Accountability
Really smart organizations have already figured out that they will not be able to attract and retain really great people by allowing them to be abused or disrespected. Toxic leaders are uninspiring, demoralizing, and always destructive — which is why, thankfully, this style of leadership is rapidly going the way of the dinosaurs.
“Toxic leaders are uninspiring, demoralizing, and always destructive — which is why, thankfully, this style of leadership is rapidly going the way of the dinosaurs.”
Forward thinking companies also understand that employees work at their best when they are treated with trust, respect, and fairness — timeless values that really matter to people and which will never go out of style. At the same time, organizations are waking up to the fact that abusive leaders drive away talent, making them simply too expensive to keep — regardless of their ability to deliver results.
HR managers and leaders who understand this can significantly help to shape the company’s culture, policies and practices, as well as its reward systems, employee communications, training and related prevention efforts. The new organizational strategy emerging when it comes to dealing with toxic leaders is sharply focused on accountability and goes something like this: Find them, fix them, or fire them.
So, here’s a word to the wise: it’s a new day. Toxic leaders are increasingly being viewed as irrelevant relics of a long ago past — the workplace equivalent of dinosaur fossils. The choice for toxic leaders is now clear: change or become extinct.
Learn more in this related title from De Gruyter
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